Why Solo Sex Doesn’t Help Your Marriage

Brace yourself. I am about to unashamedly tell you why masturbation is not healthy for your marriage. Are you wondering why? I believe solo sex hinders your marriage relationship for these reasons.

There Is A Purpose For Masturbation Within Marriage

I want to clarify something about the difference between masturbation and solo sex. I am not suggesting that masturbation (achieving orgasm with your own hands) should never occur. It can have its place during intimacy with your spouse if you both are comfortable with that. However, solo sex (pleasing yourself alone) is not helping your marital relationship.

There may be times when you have to spend extended time apart from your spouse. I also want to clarify that I am not suggesting you should go without sexual release during this time. I am encouraging you to include your spouse in your sexual desires which includes self-stimulation.

Solo Sex Damages Your Marriage

It is a popular misconception that solo sex enhances your marriage. I’m just not getting that idea. There are many people out there who feel spending time exploring yourself will make sex better with your spouse. I have not heard any legitimate reasons why this could be true.

The more you engage in solo sex, the less you will want to engage in physical intimacy with your spouse. Why would you want to initiate sex when you’ve already satisfied yourself? While solo sex is faster, you are missing out on connecting with your spouse.

Yes, engaging in sexual intercourse takes much more work than solo sex. The more you desire solo sex, the less you’ll desire your spouse. You will eventually have less sex because you are already getting it by yourself. This will damage your relationship down the road.  

solo sex damages marraige

Sexual Release Replaces Sexual Intimacy

Sexual intimacy is “intimacy” for a reason. It requires two people. There is a special mental and physical bond that happens during sex that leads to mutual satisfaction. Sex is so much more than just achieving an orgasm.

Sexual intimacy with your spouse establishes a connection with them that you cannot achieve during solo sex. Some people believe that solo sex helps you connect with yourself. Find a way to do that with your spouse.

Talk with your spouse about your sexual needs and desires. It hurts your marriage to replace intimacy with solo release. You will miss out on creating an amazing connection with your spouse.

Intimacy in marriage sexy truth or dare

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How to Develop The Right Mindset For a Rockin Sex Life

Many woman struggle with their sexual health and have no idea where to start. First and foremost, it is important to realize that men are easily aroused through physical encounters, while women require more emotional connection. In order for a woman to reach the point of orgasm, her mind and emotions must be completely engaged with her partner. Once this occurs, truly amazing sex can be enjoyed by both.

Most women struggle with the way that they think about themselves. Women have many reasons as to why they struggle with having the right mindset for sex. I have listed several ways that you can prepare yourself to have the right attitude for enjoyable sex with your spouse.

You can read the full post at Love Hope  Adventure




What Causes Low Libido?

Both husbands and wives are susceptible to low libido. What is low libido exactly? It’s when you don’t have the desire to have sex. So, what causes that? Here are a few reasons your desire may drop

1. Sex is Painful

Some people experience pain when they are having sex. Discomfort during sex will kill the mood.

These are a few of the types of pain you might experience:

When you are in pain during a time of sex, it can keep you from enjoying yourself. In fact, you may not orgasm at all. It can be hard to be excited about sex if you know you are going to be let down.


2. Medication or Medical Conditions

Some medications can cause your desire to go away. Medications like birth control and antidepressants are big culprits. Talk to your doctor about trying a different medicine if it keeps up. There might be other things you can do to control your condition.

3. Too Tired

Maybe you have little babies you are getting up with all through the night. Or, you might be in a busy season of life at work. It could be that you have been sick for a while. No matter what the reason you are tired, it can keep you from getting excited about sex.

4. Being Pregnant

Some women have a higher libido when they get pregnant. Others have hormone changes that decrease their desire. Even when you are breastfeeding, it can cause your hormones to be out of whack.

This season of a woman’s life also brings a lot of factors that can make it hard for her to engage in sex. Taking care of children is draining and exhausting. It causes women to have a different opinion of her body, which can keep her from not feeling sexy.

5. Problems in The Marriage

Real problems in the marriage can keep you from enjoying sex with your spouse. It can be hard to feel close to someone when you are always fighting.

If you are dealing with low libido, it’s best to figure out what’s going on. Once you know the reason behind what you are dealing with, you can work towards a solution.


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3 At Home Date Night Ideas For The Winter

I don’t know where you live, but it is cold here in Texas right now. Surprisingly enough, we’ve had to run our fireplace quite a bit this week. I thought it would be fun to give you a few ideas of sexy date night ideas for these long winter nights.

1. Snuggle Date

Invite your spouse to a night of snuggling. Make up a basket of warm items you can cozy up with. Put in a blanket, socks, pj’s, and hot chocolate.

Include fun things to do in the basket as well. Choose a fun movie that you will both enjoy. Of course, the top pics would include a movie that has a romance story, whether it is a comedy or drama.

Also, you can add a few packages of hot chocolate and other snacks to enjoy while you watch the movie. To really make this date night sexy, get undressed and snuggle under the covers towards the end of the movie. It will help build anticipation for activities to come afterward.

2. Enjoy Dinner In Front of the Fireplace

Light the fire and spread out blankets and pillows on the floor. If you do not have a fireplace, do the same thing in front of your Christmas tree or some soft lighting. You can even  

Put together a simple menu that you and your spouse can eat while sitting on the floor together. To make it more comfortable, place the pillows up against a wall or couches so that you both have a way to recline while eating.

Want to kick it up a notch? Make the night sexier by wearing lingerie or something revealing. Focus your conversation on sex or something sultry. It will make the night even more exciting.

3. Make Smores

If you do not have a fire indoors, you can build one outside that you can huddle around. The night sky and blazing flames are sure to give you the environment you need to have a romantic evening.

If you can, roast a few marshmallows and feed them to each other. I once saw that you can actually roast them over a candle flame. Not sure if it would actually work, but you can try!

Sexy date nights are so easy in the winter. Snuggling and cuddling in front of the fire and warm glowing lights is so much fun. Of course, don’t forget to take off your clothes at some point and enjoy some naked snuggling.

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Tips for Hotter Sex and How to Get Into Difficult Sex Positions

Do you want ideas on how to have hotter sex? What about tips on how to get in more difficult sex positions? Well, you’re in luck, because Austin and I are bringing on a guest tonight to answer these questions. Brent, the owner of Married Dance and Christian Friendly Sex Positions is coming on our live webinar to give us tips and tricks to help with your sex life.

What I love about Brent is that he has worked very hard to share the sex education we all crave in a God honoring way. He’s a guy that can answer your questions and give you real helps.

Be sure to sign up for the free webinar through the link below.

Sign up for the free webinar here 

These are the questions we are going to answer:
1. what keeps a couple from trying new sex positions?
2. how can one partner approach their spouse to try a new position?
3. Are there any tips you can give us to make sex hotter?
4. What are your tips for a couple that is going to try a more advanced position?
5. What are a few advanced positions you suggest?
6. Do you have any aids that would help couples with these positions in your store?

Hope you enjoy the conversations and get some great tips for how to have hotter sex and get into difficult positions.

How to Talk About Your Sexual Fantasies With Your Spouse

I get it, it’s really hard to talk about sexual fantasies with your spouse. In fact, some people think that it is more intimate to talk about sex even more so than having sex. You have to open yourself up and share your feelings and emotions.

We had Jay Dee from Uncovering Intimacy on a webinar with us recently to talk about this very thing. He said that many of his readers say that they struggle in this area. He gave us some really great advice. You can check out the webinar and listen in.

If you would rather read what Jay has to say, you can head over to Uncovering Intimacy and read his post, The Best Way to Talk About Sexual Fantasies.

Top 10 Sex Positions

I received this amazing resource from the owner of Christian Friendly Sex Positions. He put together a list of the top 10 sex positions from 2017. These are the top ranking positions on his website. I would say that many couples should be able to do at least a few off this list.

Check out the hottest sex positions from this past year-

10. Packing the Suitcase


top sex positions

This position requires the wife to raise her legs above her head. If she is not quite flexible enough for that, then she should bring her legs to the side and not straight up. Instead of the husband having his arms around her legs, she should open her legs more and let them fall to the side.

9. Flatiron


hottest sex positions

Flatiron is a rear entry position that requires both husband and wife to lay on the bed. You can do this position without  using a sex pillow. However, using a pillow like that will make this position easier. Otherwise, the wife is going to need to bring her butt up towards her husband’s stomach.

8. Indian Headstand


hottest sex positions

I’ll be honest, I have no idea who has the strength to do this one. But you might be able to make something like this happen if the wife laid over a chair to help brace herself. Basically, both husband and wife are going to need some strength and agility.


 7. Jack Hammer


hottest sex positions

The husband needs to brace his hands against a wall so that he can hold himself up. The wife will pleasure him with her mouth.

6. Throat Swab


hottest sex positions

For the Throat Swab, a wife will need to lay down and hang her head off the edge of a bed. The husband will need to spread his legs and stand over her. He should gently place his member in her mouth and slowly thrust, being careful to not go too deep.

5. Reverse Grinding the Corn


hottest sex positions

A lot of women like Reverse Grinding the Corn (reverse coital alignment technique, or CAT). It is a wife-on-top sex position. It can allow for deep penetration for the husband. But, for the wife, there is great clitoral stimulation. She can also determine how deep she wants to go. 

4. Doggy Style


hottest sex positions

Doggy Style is also known as “From Behind”. This position can give a women great g-spot stimulation, but her husband needs to be aware of how deep she can handle it. Make sure there is plenty of communication between husband and wife for both to enjoy this position. 

The wife can consider using a bullet vibrator to stimulate her clitoris while her husband makes love to her.

3. Grinding the Corn

hottest sex positions

Grinding the Corn (coital alignment technique, or CAT) is a husband-on-top sex position with great clitoral stimulation. The wife should raise her hips and squeeze her butt during this position to make it more stimulating. She can also put a pillow under her bottom to get the right angle. 

2. Best View


hottest sex positions

Best View is a sex position where the wife lays on her back and the husband gets on his knees. He will need to bend his member down to insert it in his wife. The wife will need to rock her bottom down towards the bed and help to guide her husband in. 

This is a great position for the husband to use a bullet vibrator on his wife.

1. Banana Split

hottest sex positions

Banana Split is a deep penetration sex position that’s enjoyed using the edge of a table or counter top. If there is a large height difference between the husband and wife, then the shorter one should stand on a stool. This will help to get the angles right for penetration. 

I hope that you and your spouse enjoy these positions.

sexy truth or dare

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What Are Things That Distract You During Sex?

Do you feel distracted during sex? If so, you’re not the only one. Many couples struggle with this for many different reasons.

Maybe you find your mind wandering to things you need to get done in a day. Or, maybe something happens that kills the mood for you.

Here’s a few distracting things that can happen during sex and ways to keep it from happening. You can’t keep all distractions down, but you can reduce them with some planning.

Distractions That Happen During Sex

Rock Your Sex Life With These Black Friday Deals

I bet you’ve seen a lot of Black Friday and Cyber Monday roundups over the last few days…at least I know I have. I’m a bit of deal hound to say the least. But, I haven’t seen any real roundups of deals that will help you have a better sex life- so here ya go.

Love Hope Adventure Shop

If you didn’t know, Love Hope Adventure, my sister site, has a shop. You can get 50% off of your order in our shop between now and Monday at midnight. Use the coupon code blackfriday at checkout. You can see our large selection of printable bedroom games and other printables. Go to my store here.

Married Dance Christian Friendly Sex Toy Store

Married Dance is a Christian friendly sex toy store that I trust. They have porn free packaging and images on the website. You can also see their great description of the different items in the store. Use my coupon code love at checkout to get 15% off your order. Go here to see what they sell.

Uncovering Intimacy Games

Uncovering Intimacy put two of their spicy games on sale. They are 50% off the regular price when you go to checkout. No coupon code required. See those two products here.

4 Marriage Bed Tips Round-up

Are you looking for some new ways to spice up your sex life? There’s many fun things you can do to make sex feel better for you or your spouse. I put together a round-up of marriage bed tips you can try.

1. Button Rub Intercourse Technique

Marriage Bed Tips suggests that you use the button rub technique in order to stimulate a wife’s clitoris during sex. God designed a woman to have 8,000 nerve endings in the clitoris. If you haven’t taken time to really get to know your anatomy, it is important that you and your spouse explore.

Check out the detailed instructions of how to get more stimulation during intercouse in their post-

The Button Rub Intercourse Technique

2. A Day of Sex

I’m so glad that my friend Jay Dee wrote about his experience with having a day of sex with his wife. He came up with the idea and figured out some rules that he and his wife played by during the day. It was a really great experience for them.

If you want to try it with your spouse, then check out his post here-

A Day of Sex

How to dirty talk

3. Husband’s Hands When Wife is On Top

El Fury put together a great post about what a husband can do with his hands while his wife is on top of him during sex. If your wife isn’t one that likes an on top position, she may reconsider if you add in some of these ideas.

Head over and check out his round-up here-

Husband’s Hands When Wife is On Top

4. Foreplay Moves That Will Actually Turn You On

If you are like me, then you’re tired of reading “how to spice it up” posts that tell you to do one of three horrible things- watch porn, masturbate, or have a threesome. That’s why I wrote a post full of ideas that are actually healthy for your marriage.

Check out my full list of foreplay moves here-


Foreplay Moves That Will Actually Turn You On


What marriage bed tips would you add to the list? Leave me a comment!

Sexy truth or dare bedroom game